On a wet and blustery...oh wait that was last week...On a tropical afternoon, with Peeley looking like a snowman in the wrong place at the wrong time, and chris r turning from milk chocolate to dark chocolate before our very eyes simon took us on his biddle inspired warm up forgetting to work not just the minor muscle groups but any muscle group, a dehydrated set of rag tag players, prepared for the first game of the season as an A XV should do...with 13 of the 21 players being different from the ones that played at Ivel the week before, inc. 8 of the starting XV:

1-Rich 'can i call a friend' Borries
2-Simon 'you can have the rest but the lineout is mine' Pengelly
3-Alex 'it just hurts' White
4-Martyn 'well i had a great game' Peel
5-Chris 'can i play second row every week please' Rochfort
6-Tony 'why are you all suppressing yawns' O'Connell
7-Rob 'i love it when i make sheep bleed' Goodfellow
8-Mark 'i can play until the skiing season starts' Andrews
9-Dave 'not that i'm telling you what to do but...' Clarke
10-Wes 'where's my three pound' Lewis
11-Owen 'no really you are the first person to tell me my wife could eat no lean' Spratt
12-Jamie 'the rest of you just aren't fit enough' Powell
13-Leigh 'no i'd like to play on the wing this week' Ford
14-Jordan 'can i only play half a game' Mockett
15-Joe 'that didn't hurt' Gower
16-Ross 'yes i'll play prop' McDonald
17-Mark 'i'll bring my friend but he likes to watch' Adams
18-Tim 'no one told me i was playing' Cousins
19-Joe 'i think i'm still drunk' Uniboy
20-Iain 'yes i know i'm a glad' Ka
21-Mike 'i'll play anywhere just get me on' Solway

From kick off (it was a rubbish game according to Mrs O'Connell who would rather i was rubbing her feet right now) Dorchester took the game to Bournemouth, and they had the better of the early exchanges, like two prize fights initially trying to find a hole in the others defence, it was rather against the run of play that Bournemouth caught us with the sucker punch and chasing his own kick it was the Bournemouth wing (on his way to having a great game) who scored in the corner. Poor Owen, having just been made to look slower then the one legged prop from cabin crew was given sound words of advice from Wes who said 'you should have tackled him'..yes well done Wes.

However showing grit, determination and no lack of heart, Peeley got himself ready for the restart (already getting progressively slower - well spotted Mrs Peel) as did the rest of the team and most of the rest of the first half was spent throwing the kitchen sink at the Bournemouth line. It was only a lack of composure at keys moments that stopped Dorchester scoring, with Borries forgetting the lineout calls on their try line and lifting the wrong jumper, Clarkey giving a crash ball to the smallest man on the pitch, or Wes looking at Leighs banana yellow boots then throwing a miss pass that went forwards, backwards then forwards again whilst trying  13 man miss pass. It was Mark Andrews though turning back the clock on the big pitch who had a stormer in the first half, if only he'd remembered how to pass oh what might have been, but eventually the pressure did tell, and after some good work from the backs and forwards Alex went over in the corner (that he ran off after the game before celebrating his first try for the club shall be addressed in a few weeks time). The half finished with Dorchester again camped on the Bournemouth line after another run from Joe G, and as the whistle went it was the visitors who needed the break more.

It is difficult to say what exactly went wrong, as coming off injured for the second week in a row i spent most of the second half helping my little girl colour in a picture of a power ranger. Whatever it was, what wasn't lacking was guts which this team has plenty of and although the game finished 5-19 that certainly doesn't reflect what happened. Everyone should walk proud as we can only get better, and with a bit more effort to get to training we will do.

Man of the Match: Joe Gower, aside from a great game, he deserved it alone for his second half 'boom'